Meditation and Psychotherapy 3 : Difficulties Along the Path
If you have started meditation practice, by now, you have already noticed that meditation isn’t always lotuses and incense. Meditation can be very hard. And of course that can be quite a disappointment since we often go into the practice of meditation with the expectation that we will feel deeply relaxed and have deep mystical experiences. When this doesn’t occur, we can easily give up, concluding that this simply isn’t right for me. Or we can start meditation shopping in order to find the best or most powerful technique to catapult us into the transcendent and sublime realms of consciousness. Proper expectations can help maintain your practice long term.
Even the Buddha experienced profound challenges as he sat under the bodhi tree prior to his eventual enlightenment. He was besieged by the Goddess Mara and her armies of demons (all of which are metaphors for delusion, desire, destraction, and temptation). It was only by remaining steadfast in his practice that he endured their onslaughts and attained emancipation.
Expect difficulties during meditation
Possibly the first thing we recognize in our early days of meditation is just how busy and undisciplined our monkey mind can be. We are assailed by a ceaseless stream of thoughts, images, inner conversations, memories and so on. We may also feel pronounced feelings of boredom since we are not used to unplugging from the continuous stream of incoming stimulation and information to which our brains have become habituated to and dependent upon and so when that stimulation is reduced, we may experience significant discomfort. We may experience guilt since we might feel that we should be doing something more useful and productive than just sitting there doing nothing productive. After all there is work to be done….dishes to wash, house projects to complete, clothing to wash, homework to do and so in. Meditation can also bring up painful memories, images, body sensations as we allow the “doors of perception” to swing open as we relinquish our inner control mechanisms.
One is also likely to face periods of restlessness and a strong desire to move. Periods of relative calm and tranquility can be interspersed with sensations of agitation, and restlessness. A variety of unusual physical sensations can also be experienced at various points in meditation. Periods of meditation may be occasionally punctuated by intervals of unusual sensory and emotional sensations. Feelings of imbalance like your body is tilted or rotated, perceptions of alterations of body size or proportion, changes in time perception, feelings of heat or cold, or any manner of sensation can occur. All if these experiences are essentially epiphenomena which is a fancy way of saying, “besides the point”. They are of no essential significance. In the psychological literature, such phenomenon which accompany deep relaxation practice are regarded as “autogenic release phenomena”. What that means is that the body which has been kept in a high arousal state for so long, tends to release its bound up tensions in a bit of a herky jerky manner.
People of course may experience what they may assume as pleasant mystical images, reveries and transcendent insights. These are also to be regarded as “mind turds” and one is cautioned not to indulge such experiences. All experiences, whether pleasant or unpleasant are potential means to distract and sidetrack one from the goal of no goals. The idea of meditation is only to be fully present and awake to the present. So whatever one experiences, just lightly note the experience and return to the count, the breath, or whatever one is focusing upon.
And then there is physical pain. We are not used to sitting for long periods of time in an immobile manner. We may feel tremendous discomfort in our feet, legs, or back. We may be inclined to move and adjust our position to decrease the pain or to prevent what we are certain will be lasting nerve and tendon damage if we continue to sit. I was particularly plagued by this issue when I first commenced formal monastic training and it has persevered to this day. I was instructed to actually focus on the pain which helped me to ultimately recognize that pain and hurt are two very separate things. Hurt is a construct of the mind due to our resistance to pain which actually is a prime root of suffering. By embracing pain in all its manifestations, whether mental or physical, it can be an important factor to catapult our growth. Having said that, there is no need to be a martyr. Depending on age, medical issues and flexibility, one can adopt a seating position that can accommodate one’s needs. A straight back chair is absolutely fine, or any other position in which one’s back is erect and centered.
Good luck in your practice. Over time, concentration will improve and your mind will be cultivated to reach a more open, less reactive, and more awakened state. Be patient and commit to the discipline if daily sitting. Nature will take care of the rest. But also remember that meditation doesn’t end when we leave the seat. The real art is to make everything in life a meditation. More on that another time.
Please feel free to chime in with your questions, experiences, difficulties and so on.
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